What is going on?

I’m a bit late to the New Year Resolutions this year.  It’s taken me a while to get my head around things.  2013 was a rough year.  So was 2012, actually.

I don’t want another year like that.

But 2014 is here regardless and we might as well make the most of it.

So here are my not-all-that-new year resolutions:

  1. Don’t lose weight
  2. Don’t set goals
  3. Get on with it

I would love to lose weight, I would.  I’d love to be willowy and glamorous and wear sleeveless dresses and have a completely flat tummy.  

But it isn’t me.  I’m the solid, bosomy, put-some-sleeves-on-for-fuck’s-sake type.

I’ve been overweight for most of my adult life.  There was a brief spell of being relatively svelte just before I fell pregnant for the first time, but that was nearly twelve years ago.

I’ve spent years worrying about being over-weight, fretting about it, giving myself grief, being embarrassed.  Planning what I will wear if I ever get thin. Becoming more and more frumpy while I wait.

No more.

I would love to be thin but I will not care about it any more.

I do care about being healthy.  The last couple of years have been tough mostly because my Dad has very severe health problems.  It has broken my heart and it has broken my family.  It has caused me to have a mid-life crisis of sorts.

Or maybe being middle-aged caused that.

If I can prevent my kids ever having years like that I will.  But the weight-loss merry-go-round will not get me there.  I know.  I’ve tried.

So instead of setting goals and going on a diet and joining weight-loss programs and all the other things that haven’t worked for me in the past – resolution number 3.  Get on with it.

I’m starting a habit chart, like Jerry Seinfeld.  Because who doesn’t want to be like Jerry Seinfeld?  

My only job is to not break the chain.  I’ll eat healthy food, exercise every day and get enough sleep.

Every day, and then I get to put a cross on my calendar.  Three crosses, because I have three things, see?

Maybe instead of crosses I could get stickers.  I love stickers.

I’m having a mid-life crisis but I’m still basically five.

I’ve been reading widely on self-improvement over the past eighteen months or so – because mid-life crisis – looking for the answer.  And the answer is not, in fact, 42.  Which is a shame, because I’m almost 42, and I was looking forward to being the answer.

But no.  The answer is to eat well, sleep enough and move heaps.  And it doesn’t matter much what the question is, because that is always the answer.  I have it on many authorities, because I read a lot.  Not as pithy as 42, but still, the answer.

There’s one more thing I might give myself a sticker for – writing.

Not writing well, not writing lots, not writing a book, just writing.  I’ve always wanted to be a writer, so now I am one.

See?  Get on with it.  It works!

I have no idea what I want to write or should write or even can write, so I will just write.

If anybody is out there – and if you’re having a mid-life crisis too – or if you’re not … I’d love to hear from you.

Do you do new year resolutions? When it’s almost February?  What are they?

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